yeah, it's a little early for that title, but it's a year ago that i got my BFP (pregnancy test), and that lends to some introspection/retrospection. or something like that.
reading my posts from a year ago, i'm so much better now! i'm not exhausted (well, not the same), i get lots more done, i'm not as despondent! having a new baby is a much better place for me than being PG. as i've mentioned before, old wives like to say to BIG pregnant women "it's much easier to take care of them now than after they're born," to which i reply HOGWASH! life and living is so much easier after they're born, plus you get a baby-moon to recover in and get used to taking care of an infant again.
it's been a VERY full year. i'm thinking of writing a book about this last year - i have so much material, i could write a dozen! when i start remembering, so much comes back that i am amazed i made it. but we both did! and life is good.
life is still hard, but i'm HOPEFUL that it will improve, and have plans on how to effect that. in fact, i'm more hopeful than i've been in some time; probably since i dropped out of school again a few years ago. that may be related to my decision to FIND A WAY to return and get a degree. we'll never be able to retire otherwise, and i live in dread of something happening to DH (for many reasons). i haven't felt close to him in a long time, and i'm feeling closer now than i have, too, so that makes a big diff.
DH turns 48 tomorrow! yeah, he's an old man. his daddy passed at 48, so the next year will be emotionally difficult for him. once he's 49 he's home-free!
i also rant about bras every year at this time, but don't see much point now; i'll be thrilled when i can sleep without one again, and put away the industrial-strength nursing bras, but anything i have to say right now has been said enough.